I am taking a weaving class, with an honest-to-God loom. This cannot end well. A few months ago I began attending a needlepoint class at our local stitchery shop. I now have seven grandchildren and just finished the first Christmas stocking. You see my problem? The first one took me six years to complete. At that rate, I’m not sure I have enough time left to finish the remaining six, unless I want to work on the big plastic canvas at the weekly workshop run by Becky the Activity Director at Rusty Manor Retirement Village. I thought a class would be a good way to insure that I worked on a project at least a few hours a week. It’s amazing at how being around other women, who actually know what they are doing, will step up your game.
Last week, the owner of the shop decided to teach a weaving class. I do not need another hobby or craft. As previously stated, I can’t keep up with what I have. I have six remaining grandchildren that will wake up Christmas morning and look at me in that wounded way that only grandchildren have, and say “Honey, you made Mia a stocking. Where is my Christmas stocking?” I wasn’t going to do it…really I wasn’t. Then I saw one of the beautiful scarves that Kathy had made and I was like “I’m in!” The grandchildren need to learn about disappointment anyway. So now, I am a loom owner. I bet you never saw that coming.
I let the cat out of the bag last week by accidentally posting my newest brain fart on Facebook, and you wouldn’t believe the snarky comments I got. I was accused of turning into an “Earth Mama”…I don’t know what that is, but I suspect that it involves Birkenstocks, and that’s not going to happen. My mother suggested that I might want to think about hair weaving instead. That was not a bad idea, so I am incorporating her suggestion into my weaving. Everyone who left a rude comment gets a Corgi hair scarf for Christmas, except for my brother Randy, who gets a full sweater for his comment that I’m an “honest-to-God loon.” With summer coming on, I figure Sophie will leave me enough hair to finish all my projects by June.
Getting everything set up is the hardest part…of nearly everything, now that I think about it. In weaving, this is officially called loading the loom, and unfortunately it does not involve tequila. It is the process of getting the warp or what I just like to call the long threads set up on the loom. The back and forth threads are called the weft, if you want to get technical. It took five of us to get the looms set up yesterday so that we could come back and weave today. Could I do it again? No, I could not. This means that if I ever want to make a second scarf, I am going to have to drag everything back to the shop and be taught again, which I will have to do simply to justify the cost of my equipment investment. I should have made pictures of each of the 75 steps with my iPhone. I have great ideas, after the fact. Now that I have two classes firmly under my belt, I am on my way. If I quit now, I’ll have a beautiful six inch scarf or one very large, very expensive coaster.