Scarlott Letters

Just some stuff I find funny…

The good, the bad and the ugly…

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Joe has a new 18-year old in his life that takes him to new heights of enlightenment. Her name is Glenlivet. He and Dave stayed up and solved the problems of the world with that sweet young thing after everyone else had long gone to bed.

I’m accustomed to places that offer a toaster, bagels and one of those dispensers where you can get Fruit Loops for breakfast. This morning we had goat cheese frittatas, ham, toast and fresh fruit. Wonderful!

Afterwards we met Captain Carl and took off for a full day on the boat. Our first stop was the Indians where Joe snorkeled for the first time. The ride over nearly beat us to death. I just closed my eyes and held on for dear life.

After the Indians, we headed to Willy T’s which is a floating bar. It’s a double decker and its claim to fame is diving off the top nude. If you read last year’s blog you know that Tres will do anything for a free tee shirt. Unfortunately, they forgot to mention that they no longer give out free tee shirts for naked diving…psych! Four out of five of our men are certifiable and dove off sans clothes…one even went twice. It happened so fast, it was just a blur. Luckily, Julia’s got the whole thing on video. The fact that one of the guys is sane actually works to everyone’s benefit by giving every guy plausible deniability. The women also got crazy. Gina got a personalized tattoo from the bartender and Kirk did a body shot off of Julie as a bachelorette party kind of thing. This whole scenario is not something I ever anticipated but it was like a car wreck…I just couldn’t look away. I don’t know, but I think the whole man-thong thing might be kind of a let down at this point.

Our next stop was Green Kay. White sandy beaches and turquoise water. We almost got close enough to walk in from the boat…but not quite. Joe and Gina towed my ass in to shore…kind of like a tugboat and barge, me being the barge. It’s always further away than it looks. I think Captain Carl was a little concerned when he discovered that I don’t swim. I wonder what gave it away.

The best stop of the day was the Soggy Dollar Bar on Jost Van Dyke. It’s one of the most famous bars in the world. There are no docks so you have to swim in…yippee!They hang the “soggy dollars” on a clothesline above the bar to dry out. They also make great painkillers. Joe looks at the webcam online almost every day of the year so he was in heaven. After the Soggy Dollar we went around the bend, figuratively and literally, to Foxy’s for dinner, which was great. Afterwards, we took off for the house, after dark, at breakneck speed. Kudos to Captain Carl for getting us back in one piece, fully clothed.





One thought on “The good, the bad and the ugly…

  1. All I’ve got to say at this point is, “Lord help you crazy people.” You are obviously not good influences on each other!!! I hope y’all are not trying to top the previous day as each new day rolls around.

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